Which would you say is your default or automatic pilot, if you will, and how would it be any different if there were absolutely no accountability for your actions or people in your life you were trying to impress or live up to? In other words, I’m looking for the naked truth here.
When I say innately bad, I don’t mean evil; I’m talking more like… just not good.
I’d like to think of myself as being innately good…but that might not be entirely true.
When I think about it, I can be lazy if I’m not careful. In fact, there’ve been many times in my life when I’ve not only taken the easy way out of situations, but also rationalized such actions just to make myself feel better.
Is that a trait of a bad person? Well that depends on how often he or she…wait a minute, there I go rationalizing again.
I’ve also been known to occasionally fly off the handle and be downright ornery for absolutely no good reason… it just comes out of nowhere. What’s that all about? It’s not about being good, that’s for damn sure.
And there’s this addictive personality I have to deal with, which if left unchecked, would definitely lead to bad things. Wow!… I’m a mess.
I could list many more examples, but it’s beginning to depress me.
When I think about my shortcomings, it’s not so much that I’m bad… but rather my inner goodness is like a piece of charcoal which lays dormant until lit. But once it’s lit, I’m on fire. So I guess you could say… I’m innately charcoal.
Thank God these character flaws don’t make me happy… and for that reason, I refuse to let them dictate my life. Let’s just say, I’ve learned to carry matches.
What about you?