The only real stability in a child’s life is two parents who love each other. With that being said, a child with separated or divorced parents has absolutely no stability, which is vital to his wellbeing, in his life. All he has left is his innate eternal hope which consumes him with the illusion of somehow getting his family back together again. And he won’t rest until either he accomplishes his goal or loses his hope…whichever comes first.
The more you fight, the more chaotic his life becomes as it affects literally every aspect of his world. His studies take a back seat…he doesn’t take time to make friends…his sleep is restless…he can’t relate to others well…he doesn’t know whether he’s coming or going most of the time. And it’s all going on under the radar simultaneously as you’re wrapped up with your situation.
As he loses hope in recovering his family stability, he turns to other places for comfort. Make no mistake about it, he will find it. And generally it’s with people who have similar problems…people you will label “the wrong crowd”.
He’ll find it with gangs; he’ll find it with alcohol; he’ll find with drugs. He will find it somewhere. And after completely missing out on his childhood and everything that goes with it, he will either, by the grace of God, find his way back or as many do… or he won’t. And if you think I’m going off the deep end…just look around.
If there are children involved, please stop and think of the awesome power and responsibility you have as a parent before making a conscious decision to do anything that will separate your family in any way from each other.
I’m not judging your individual situation. I’m just showing you what it looks like through the eyes of a child. If you’ve been through it, you know what I say is true. If you haven’t…trust me on this one.
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